"I have about 8 million Vietnamese Dongs."
"If you get a hot spot, tell me so I can turn on wifi"
"I was just COOKIN' it down that hill over there!"
"ZEBOOOK!" -Jacob (that's the sound of a pencil shaped asteroid hitting the Earth)
JACOB: "Mushrooms are my favorite vegetable!"
ABE: "You're my favorite vegetable, Jacob."
JACOB: "Wait, so are mushrooms fruit?"
"These don't come from trees..."
"I didn't know Bryan changes his mind like a girl changes clothes"